So this is how it feels when you know you're gonna lose something which you always wanted. Damn, its like everything is being unfair to you and life is just pissing all over you. And hey, to top it all of, I'm trying to push someone away from me which could might as well make me cry anytime now. Hmm...its like the feeling that you get just before you're about to cry with that lump just above your stomach. Oh yeah, it feels like hell alrite with no one to talk to about all of this, this is where i say that life officially sucks.
Thats it, may be I was meant to be alone anyways. May be that is for the best. Atleast that way I wont be able to hurt anyone which I have been doing a lot lately. According to everyone, everything is going just A-OK with my life. Hell, some people even envy the kinda life I have. And here I am, ready to do anything to swap places with anyone, anytime because this life just isn't worth it. So here I stand, knowing of what I am throwing away but just can't help but think why does this happen to me.
I look around me and see people look oh so happy with their lives. Sure, I do understand they have their own shit to deal with but the difference between them and me, when I fake about being happy, I just turn all cynical. That's what i call being half broken hearted because I know I can make this right, but everything I do is just not enough.
Everything was in secret and it is in secret silence that I grieve. So yeah, I may be a loser for not doing anything about it, but I am pieces of you.
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